


Who You Have Made Me Into

by that_fangirl_in_the_corner



Category: CLAMP - Works, Tokyo Babylon, X -エックス- | X/1999
Genre: Bittersweet Ending, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-10
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-19 00:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4726523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/that_fangirl_in_the_corner/pseuds/that_fangirl_in_the_corner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bloodied clothes I refuse to take off. Branded hands I refuse to conceal. Blinded and lifeless eyes I refuse to brighten. Broken heart I refuse to trust others with. Is this who you have made me into, Seishirō-san?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who You Have Made Me Into

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Tokyo Babylon, X, Cardcaptor Sakura, or any of CLAMP’s works and characters; I only own the non-canonical portion of the story.  
**NOTE** : This is a chaptered fic, but this is NOT the complete first chapter.

The irony. _I was the one trying to be killed by him, but_ I  _wound up killing him instead._ It mocks me. _I’m sure he’s smirking at me this very moment. Amused, no doubt. I’d love to wipe that grin right off his face – but I’m not capable of it. And I’m sure you know that too, Seishirō-san._  
I sighed, softly blowing out the smoke from my cigarette and letting it float around me. I caught a glance of my reflection in the half-covered mirror across the room and sighed once more.  
_Bloodied clothes I refuse to take off. Branded hands I refuse to conceal. Blinded and lifeless eyes I refuse to brighten. Broken heart I refuse to trust others with. Is this who you have made me into, Seishirō-san?_  
Turning away from the mirror, I got up from the chair and walked over to the floor-to-ceiling window. Undoing the latch and spreading the panes to the side, I murmured soft words no one would ever hear.  
“I’m sorry, Kamui.” I paused. “I know I’m in no place to tell you this, but don’t let Fūma and yourself live a repeat of my pathetic story.”  
I stepped out onto the outside windowsill and jumped to a neighboring roof – as per the tradition of the Dragons of Heaven and Earth – travelling to nowhere in particular.

…

I ended up at the Sakurazuka family home. The dried blood on my white coat only added to the scent of the crimson liquid heavy in the air, and as I walked through the large, well-kept garden, the overwhelming aroma of sakura and blood made me nauseous.  
Some time passed; I wasn’t sure of how much. I slowly wandered the grounds, making circles throughout their entirety countless times, yet never daring to enter the house. When he stepped into the property, I was standing underneath a cherry tree, the pale blossoms forming an ever-changing backdrop behind me, transforming me into the mirror image of the teenager at Ueno Park who made a bet with a child _onmyouji_.  
“Fūma.”  
“Subaru.” The ‘Kamui’s’ voice was slightly tinged with surprise at the lack of honorific. To him and the rest of the Dragons, I was still the well-mannered, reserved, proper Sumeragi. But that persona would soon be shaken off; I could feel it, and I did not believe that I deserved to bear the title of the Sumeragi head any longer. Plus, I knew the second ‘Kamui’ all too well to refer to him so detachedly – Kamui’s confidences and my own experiences with ‘Kamui’s’ counterpart were enough.  
“I no longer have anything to do with the Promised Day.”  
A raise of an eyebrow from the ‘Kamui’ that told me,  _I already know that._  
A near-imperceptible sigh from the other; only audible to the one who had produced it – the art had been perfected long ago.  
“The Sakurazukamori had a wish.”  
_Seishirō-san? A wish? I doubt that’s even possible. He… He doesn’t have any emotions, much less a wish worthy of being granted by the 'Kamui.'_


End file.
